"The secret to change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.
- Dan Millman, “Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book That Changes Lives”
People make resolutions to start off the New Year, such as dieting, giving up smoking, saving money and making more money. As we begin 2017, a common resolution on the minds of many is to get a divorce.
Oftentimes, this “resolution” was made earlier in the year, but there was a decision, or even a discussion, to not do anything until after the holidays.
Making the decision to end your marriage is the first step. Then, there is the actual process. The next step is to get yourself organized. If you have access to records regarding your assets, liabilities and income, get them. You should photocopy them and keep them somewhere safe. (The safest place is in the home of a friend or somewhere your spouse does not have access.) If you do not have access to that information, do not panic. You will be able to obtain the information during the divorce process.
After you are organized, get legal advice from an attorney in the area in which you live. Do not rely on the advice of friends and family. In particular, do not rely on information about divorces on the internet. There is a lot of misinformation on the internet. Divorces and their outcomes tend to vary from person to person based upon their circumstances. Get advice tailored to your circumstances.
Lastly, be reminded that you are not the only one in your divorce. It involves your spouse, your children, your in-laws, your friends and neighbors. You will find yourself in unfamiliar territory. However, if you remember that you are making this resolution for a reason, you will manage your divorce with dignity, and soon find yourself on the other side.
On October 4, 2016, Governor Wolf signed into law new legislation that will change the separation requirement from a two year waiting period to one year. The law goes into effect on December 3, 2016. Under current law, the Divorce Code provides that in cases where only one party desires a divorce, that party must wait two years from the date of separation before they can move the matter forward. At that two year mark, the party who is seeking the divorce can move the matter forward without the non-consenting party’s agreement. The longer waiting period has often led to cases dragging on for too much time, which can lead to more animosity between the parties. For children involved in the separation, this has often had a negative impact. As a result of the passage of this new law, the hope is that cases will resolve much more quickly.
It should be noted, however, that at the one year mark from the date of separation, the case is not resolved, but rather at that time the case is permitted to proceed. It is by no means a guarantee that the process will not be lengthy from that point forward.
Stay tuned for updates as we see how the law is applied by the courts.
The initial divorce consultation is your first meeting with the attorney. It occurs before you retain the attorney and can be utilized to determine if you and the attorney can work effectively together. Sometimes this meeting occurs because you want to have the knowledge and information if you foresee potential divorce, support or custody issues in the future or are considering a prenuptial agreement. Other times, there may be issues which require you to hire a family law attorney immediately.
Prior to the first meeting, our office will ask you to be aware of relevant topics and materials to ensure a productive meeiting. At the first meeting you are asked to bring information related to your income, assets and liabilities. If you do not have access to this information, the meeting can go forward without the information, as it can be acquired from the other party during the divorce process. Expect to be asked questions related to these areas as that will allow the attorney to provide you with a better overview of the anticipated range for a resolution of your case, whether by agreement or court order. The asssessment made at the initial consultation is based on the financial data provided, and may change as more specific information is made available. It's a good idea to make a list of your questions in advance of the initial consultation, so that the meeting will be more productive, and you do not forget to ask about your concerns.
The purpose of the first meeting with a domestic relations attorney is to gain information and have your questions answered. Over the course of an hour you will be provided with an overview of aspects of family law that may affect you: divorce, support (child support, spousal support, alimony pendente lite and alimony), custody and/or a prenuptial agreement. You may be provided with the anticipated range of outcomes for your case based upon the information provided at the consultation. Most importantly, you will have an opportunity to have your questions answered. Having a general understanding of the process and answers to your questions is important at a stressful time like this.
While this is a difficult meeting for many clients, it is important to remember that the attorney is the one who is providing information and answering questions. Family Law practitioners are well aware that clients are going through a very emotional process, and it the attorney's responsibility to put the client at ease, and help to navigate this unfamiliar and emotionally fraught territory as painlessly as possible.